Richard Grannon Spartan Life Coach

Richard Grannon The Spartan Life Coach Narcissism Support


    Exasperated

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    Bethgrant

    Posts : 1
    Join date : 2016-07-21

    Exasperated

    Post by Bethgrant on Thu Jul 21, 2016 7:32 pm

    I had a narcissistic father.  I knew that something was seriously wrong when I was young.  I did not realize he was a narc until I was married to an overt Narc.  I filed for a divorce from him after I had identified a therapist who told me what I was dealing with in 2003.  I had just given birth to our son two weeks prior to filing.  My narc ex fought me in court for a year and a half.  I did win custody but during this process he had slandered me to our neighbors, my employer and tried to have me fired several times.  (he also claimed to be a Navy Seal- which he is not...)
    I was extremely worried about getting involved in another relationship.  My therapist told me I would know...go with my gut.  Five years later I did get married to a covert Narc. and had a second child with him.  I had no idea what he was doing behind my back until it was too late.  We were in therapy due to his unhealthy sexual habits... He used sex to control me as well.  I filed for divorce in 2010.  He spent three hundred thousand dollars to "WIN", he did not.  He has been thrown in jail for harassing me in 2015 for sending me up to 30 disturbing emails a day. He told our son he was going to have me shot and killed with a sniper rifle(our son is 7 years old now), a police report was filed.  He has tried to harass every person that is in my life. He told me in front of a parenting facilitator (that I filed a motion for) that he wanted to choke and strangle me while asking it out like a mad man.  He will not leave me alone and is mandated to contact me through "Our Family Wizard" a court mandated website due to his harassment.  I have become so reclusive and I am not able to build relationships due to the fear I feel everyday.  I suffer from CPTSD.  I am also worried about the abuse that is being inflicted on my children while with their fathers.  Even though my second ex is only able to contact me on this court mandated site, he does continue to try and terrorize me covertly on the site.  I started ignoring him about 4 months ago and I feel it is driving him crazy but I do not know what he is capable of. I am sleeping with pepper spray in my bed...

    How do I get him to go away for good?
    Will ignoring him work?
    or
    Do I say things that scare him to get him to leave me alone? (I have to be careful that I don't look like I am encouraging this crazy behavior)

    tadziah23

    Posts : 4
    Join date : 2016-08-11

    Re: Exasperated

    Post by tadziah23 on Thu Aug 18, 2016 2:55 am

    I'm so sorry to hear you are going through this. I haven't made it to the court phase yet and I am terrified. Mine took off a few weeks after finding out I was pregnant when I wouldn't get an abortion. Now he harasses me about how much he wants to see my daughter no paternity has been established even so I have allowed supervised visits at her daycare but I know my time is limited before he will resort to a court battle and he has slandered me to anyone who will listen. I don't know what advice to give you other then my therapist recommended to me that my daughter be part of therapy so she has a voice and we can make sure she has healthy boundaries and knows what is right and what is wrong regardless of it being a parent. Also, I like you have limited contact if possible. I try to think out my responses carefully and emotionless.

    I pray for you and your family no one should have to live this way.

      Current date/time is Sun Feb 19, 2017 9:19 pm