Richard Grannon Spartan Life Coach

Richard Grannon The Spartan Life Coach Narcissism Support


    Assertiveness & Boundaries Tips and Experience

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    AnniBanni

    Posts : 7
    Join date : 2016-04-30

    Assertiveness & Boundaries Tips and Experience

    Post by AnniBanni on Wed May 04, 2016 2:13 pm

    I think it would be great to open a discussion about self assertiveness here. As it happens from time to time- or sometimes more often than that- people transgress our boundaries. But some of us are numb to a degree to this transgression and get the hurtful insight later on, when response is no more possible.

    What are tell tale signs for boundary trangression for you- if we can´t feel the weirdness of a conversatin or interaction instantly yet- and how do you prevent it? For example, someone tells you what "you are" is a common one for me.

    I need nobody to teach me about what my character is. Character and personality- as Richard said wisely: persona- mask (greek) - is an illusion by the ego and can be formed and reformed again and again. At our core we´re all the same. If only we weren´t that neurotic.  king  Laughing

    I found my instinctive defenses have gotten better now and I can get a lot of shit out of my way by just using humour. Laughing

    I find the self- assertiveness course very helpful here as it contains state management practice that makes you just aggressive enough to defend your boundaries and therefore your mental health.

    I personally have an issue with being programmed as "MsNice". My ego sometimes doesn´t allow me to be anything than friendly, "civilized" (maybe as for now civilization is still an illusion, what do you think?) and "above things" - then later, when the unavoidable frustration kicks in,
    I´m obviously no longer "above things" Wink

    Can we agree on aggression/anger being a healthy emotion sometimes needed to defend ourselves and not a social faux-pas? I think, if we don´t let it out for too long,out of having to be "the bigger person" all the time and not really understanding what that means, that´s when unnecessary violence against the self and/or others comes in or it festers till we get ill.
    How do you feel about that?


    Looking forward to your input very much flower

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