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    Taking legal action or not?

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    Tebasile

    Posts : 23
    Join date : 2016-04-14
    Age : 46
    Location : Malmö, Sweden

    Taking legal action or not?

    Post by Tebasile on Thu Apr 14, 2016 9:34 pm

    Hi,

    One of my ex-Narcs who is both a covert narc and anti-social, and has multiple personality disorder has threatened to murder me (because I said no to being his live-in-slave) and is harassing me. I have made police reports on all of this, but I'm really scared because I am not sure if it is safer to just ignore him or if it is safer to seek legal protection? Perhaps I won't report any future contact from him?

    My fear is that a police report, or a court case would cause him narcissistic injury. However, if I don't set a strong boundary and if I don't ask for police assistance I can't get a protected home address, and I may be less fun to go after if he knows that the police will get involved every time.

    Any ideas around this? I guess one other way to put my question is if it's safer to lie low and take the threats and do the grey rock method of just ignoring him, or to take action? Is there any statistics on this kind of thing? Like what course of action is the statistically safer?

    Partly this is out of my own control now because I've already made the police reports so if they consider his actions to be illegal they will press charges no matter what I say.

    How can I best protect myself? Any ideas or strategies are much welcomed!
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    Tebasile

    Posts : 23
    Join date : 2016-04-14
    Age : 46
    Location : Malmö, Sweden

    Update....

    Post by Tebasile on Sun Apr 17, 2016 7:59 pm

    Unfortunately it appears that the police has decided to take legal action against this narc. So, now it's outside of my control. I am trying to protect myself as best as I can getting a PO Box for an address instead of using my regular address. It's going to be horrible and super stressful to meet him in court and I am totally freaking out, fully terrified....I curse myself for staying in contact with this narc as long as I did....
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    Tebasile

    Posts : 23
    Join date : 2016-04-14
    Age : 46
    Location : Malmö, Sweden

    Re: Taking legal action or not?

    Post by Tebasile on Mon Apr 18, 2016 8:20 pm

    Actually, another update. Today I called the police to see what was going on and then they told me that they have closed down the investigation because they won't be able to prove who sent me the email. So, that was a HUGE relief as I can only imagine that me provoking a narc with strong anti-social symptoms and a self proclaimed sadist would NOT be a good idea. Especially since him having a record might effect his income and job security and he would not understand that he himself caused the situation but would blame me for it and would rage even more against me. So, I will just grey stone my way out of this from now on and not make any more police reports. It's only stressful and doesn't seem to lead anywhere.

    BuilderOfCastles

    Posts : 9
    Join date : 2016-05-16

    Re: Taking legal action or not?

    Post by BuilderOfCastles on Mon May 16, 2016 7:55 pm

    Good day Tebasile

    The narcissist is not who you think he is
    and
    The police are not who you think they are.


    In one police officers words:
    A restraining order is a piece of paper to show prior cause
    for when we come to your house and find the perp dead.

    In other words, the police are not there to protect you.
    There is nothing they can do.

    This is from people who had a known, criminal, murdering stalker
    after them. The person would be lurking around the house, police
    were called, the person just walks away, police get there and no
    stalker to be seen. Another person crying wolf.


    And getting them sent to jail on a he-said, she said court case is
    near impossible. Especially since they are the cold, cool, rational
    NPD. And you are the emotional, frustrated, unsure of yourself
    person.


    So, what are police for? For keep track of paper work.
    File a report whenever anything major happens.
    But, it is only a paper trail.


    You have to defend yourself.

    Now, the NPD will probably love going to court.
    Here is a battle where he can shine. Where he can lie to his hearts
    content. Where he can be center stage, in the lime-light.

    He probably also loves the attention you give him by being afraid.
    Oooh, what power.

    He does not think like you. Almost everything you said above that
    you thought would hurt him, he would probably enjoy the hell out of.
    And, most of your actions you thought were safe were the things you
    should not do.


    Go grey rock. When you are definitely not a source of narcissistic
    supply, then you are nothing to them.

    It is the only way out.

    Be well

    BuilderOfCastles

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    Re: Taking legal action or not?

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